4 thoughts on “A miracle for E-Bay”

1. Should I start worshiping the toast or the toaster? Is the toast the creator and the toast the offspring? To whom do I offer my burnt sacrifices? What does one sacrifice to a toaster (or toast) deity? Does the toaster ever sacrifice its offspring to atone for my sins? What kind of sins can one commit against a toaster (or toast)? Will priests and priestesses start serving crumbs instead of wafers at communion now, and butter instead of wine? …

   Damn, I hate these new religions. There’s so much new doctrine to figure out. At least self-publishing makes it easy to circulate scriptures these days.

   I wonder if I can make any money with this religion?

2. Chaplain

   I appreciate your philosophical dilemmas but you can easily find out more about the True Church of the Scorched Bread Lightly Smeared with Butter by committing to sending a tax-deductible tithe of your earnings to, well, me.

   Yes, you can make money out of it, on a franchise agreement.

   Any attempt to set up a True Church of the Scorched Bread Lightly Smeared with Butter or, Toast forbid, a Church of the Croissant and Jam will be met by a major jihad though.

3. The Church of the Cream Cheese Smeared Bagel looks like it may escape your restrictions. I’ll get on it right away.

4. Bah. Not only did I fail to cover all the copyright bases, your church has a much more appealing holy object.

Comments are closed.