We live on a planet where almost everything is tagged as the property of someone. Someone trousers a few pounds every time we eat or drink, and if breathing is still free, we know it’s only because no one’s worked out how to charge us for it.

You might think the rest of the universe was different. Well the rest of our solar system isn’t, apparently.

Chunks of the moon and other planets are being sold at the rate of 1,500 a day, according to a BBC report. The man who started it says he has already made £4.5 million and that 1.6 million sq km of moon property has already been sold, but don’t fret, there is still plenty left. Phew.

The Lunar embassy claims to be the world headquarters of extra-terrestrial sales. It sells plots of land through resellers, such as Moon estates in the UK. It’s quite impressive the way they word the sales pitch to avoid any accusations of blatant fr**d, e.g.

This page is a statement of how Ltd view the “legalities” of selling extraterrestrial property.

Their argument is that international treaties forbid any government from claiming the moon, which means that private individuals and corporations have rights to do so.

Well, this blog is now claiming the entire rest of the Moon. And Mars and Venus. And Saturn, which has always been my favourite.

In fact, given that we have a moon picture as our Technorati identifier, our claim is a lot stronger than these mickey mouse claimants. I think this blog can defend its territory at least as well as these upstarts.

We are incredibly pleased to announce our special introductory FREE moon-ownership offer. Just print this off:

Owner’s certificate
This document certifies that ………………………………………. is the owner of a 1 km square plot on the rest of the Moon/ Mars/Venus/Saturn/Pluto/ some other planet/some planet’s moon (delete as inappropriate) with all rights to exploit this property.

Don’t say we never give you anything.

Of course if you want a fancy certificate signed by us which virtually guarantees that the moon is yours, it’ll cost you. But we’ll guarantee to undercut the existing extra-terrestrial ownership certificate prices by at least $10 an acre.

In fact, we are now offering the mineral and residency rights to entire stars by negotiation. I think Alpha Centauri is only about $300 but we are still in delicate negotiations over this. We’d certainly welcome any bids.

6 thoughts on “Mooning

  1. You haven’t claimed Jupiter, I claim it! And all its moons! Joking apart it think it’s wrong to sell the moon, although individulas owning it may be better than it falling into the ownership of the American government by default…

  2. I bought one of these for an ex many moons (ha!) ago as a valentine’s (or something) gift. We understood the stupidity of the claims, but the certificate was nice and it was the sentiment that counted, and it made a nice present.

Comments are closed.