I can’t let an Awards ceremony pass unnoticed here. So here is the Exterminator’s Stermy award picture. Why, thanks, Exterminator. This may be the first time I realised a woman can get the horn. And a big “In your face, all you bloggers who didn’t get an award. Ha Ha.”

I have already thanked God, following standard award ceremony etiquette, in a comment on NoMoreHornets. I now feel like starting a full scale Award Season, so that other people can make ludicrous acceptance speeches. And if you get one, you can’t break the writers’ strike so you can’t call in professionals to put a decent acceptance speech together.

I think I’ll make a best commenters award and start bestowing it on – Oh, I don’t know, why not the best commenters? “Best” as in laugh out loud funniest. (Maybe subsidiary awards for the wisest.)

The only rule is going to be that the comment has to be intentionally funny, so no religious trolls will get one, no matter how ludicrous their claims about Rapture. Similarly, people who pick up on any reference to food and send in their amazing magic new diet tips are only mildly amusing, even if they haven’t been  launched at the spam-spotting stage.

It is to the eternal shame of this blog that the comments are almost inevitably much better than the posts. In our defence, it’s not just here. So the Award won’t just go to people who comment here.  Good comments anywhere will count. In fact, there won’t be a schedule or any rules stopping me from giving up to a thousand of them to the same person, up several times  a day.  (“Up to” includes zero obviously.)

But for the planet-shaking first edition of the Comments Platinum Award, I am going to pick Alun. His comments are always better than the posts they are on. I picked Alun because his most recent comment had me laughing out loud. It was a response to a ludicrous comment from “Concerned Christian” that consisted of a made up sob-story so mawkish that it would have raised eyebrows in a victorian drawing room.

A most unusual Biblical presentation. If you have not seen it, think you will enjoy.
Straight to the point. This is so beautiful! John 3:16
A little boy was selling newspapers on the corner, the people were in and out of the cold. The little boy was so cold that he wasn’t trying to sell many papers…. (etc)

I think it’s a two part story. Here’s the follow-up.

A little girl was selling newspapers on the corner, the people were in and out of the cold.
The little girl was so cold that she wasn’t trying to sell many papers.

She walked up to a policeman and said, ‘Mister, you wouldn’t happen to know where a poor girl could find a warm place to sleep tonight would you?

You see, I sleep in a box up around the corner there and down the alley and it’s awful cold in there for tonight. Sure would be nice to have a warm place to stay.’

The policeman looked down at the little girl and said, ‘You go down the street to that big white house and you knock on the door. When they come out the door you just say
Psalms 137:9.” *
Obviously it pays to catch God on a good day.

I have to admit that it’s only laziness that has stopped me from linking to another twenty people who’ve written brilliantly witty comments on this blog, before I even start looking at others.

* I looked it up so you wouldn’t have to:
New American Standard Bible (©1995)
How blessed will be the one who seizes and dashes your little ones Against the rock.

So here’s the much-coveted Award, Alun.