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Comments on: Torture priest blames devil for his conviction http://www.whydontyou.org.uk/blog/2007/10/10/torture-priest-blames-devil-for-his-conviction/ Challenging the Zeitgeist Thu, 11 Oct 2007 21:40:08 +0000 hourly 1 By: TW http://www.whydontyou.org.uk/blog/2007/10/10/torture-priest-blames-devil-for-his-conviction/comment-page-1/#comment-8711 Thu, 11 Oct 2007 21:40:08 +0000 http://www.whydontyou.org.uk/blog/2007/10/10/torture-priest-blames-devil-for-his-conviction/#comment-8711 Brilliant.

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By: Alun http://www.whydontyou.org.uk/blog/2007/10/10/torture-priest-blames-devil-for-his-conviction/comment-page-1/#comment-8710 Thu, 11 Oct 2007 21:25:23 +0000 http://www.whydontyou.org.uk/blog/2007/10/10/torture-priest-blames-devil-for-his-conviction/#comment-8710 I would have thought it would be quite difficult fake priesthood. It’s a highly technical skill, so being able to demonstrate what you can do might be identification enough. Perhaps it was the religious equivalent of one of those pilot-has-a-heart-attack-can-anyone-fly-a-plane scenarios. Imagine the scene at a church in downtown Santiago…
The organist notices the priest collapse in a drunken stupor. She cries out but it’s too late and the wine bottle slips from the priest’s open hand spilling its priceless contents over the floor. The cry goes up “Can anyone here perform Mass?”
“I can!” replies a figure, his face shadowed in a cowl. He leads them out onto the street and flags down a passing bus. “Quick everyone on board!” he commands. Then he turns to the driver and says, “Put your foot to the floor and don’t let the speedometer slip below 55mph. By the way is there anything you’d like to confess to?”
A call goes out from a cellphone from a passenger on the bus to the local cathedral and the Church works with the police to get the roads closed so that the bus can make it to the local off-licence in just in time to pick up another bottle of Bulgarian Red.

But oh no! There’s no bottle opener! Disaster seems unavoidable!

There’s the faint sound of a heavenly choir and the mysterious priest is touched by divine inspiration! He shakes the bottle champagne style and out pops the cork. I know red wine wouldn’t do this, but that’s what miracles are for. The spray from the wine drenches everyone in the Blood of Christ seconds before they are eternally damned.

Cut to the scene as the strange priest gets off the bus and is roundly applauded by the local Archbishop and his entourage. The Archbishop shakes his hand. “Thank you stranger,” he says. “God only knows what would have happened if we hadn’t finished Mass! But who are you?”
“Call me,” the stranger pauses, “Father Bastard, the wanderin’ priest.”
“Today Father Bastard all Santiago is in your debt,” replies the Archbishop, “I may have a little job for you…”

Now isn’t that more likely than the Catholic Church covering up the misdeeds of yet another priest?

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By: Heather http://www.whydontyou.org.uk/blog/2007/10/10/torture-priest-blames-devil-for-his-conviction/comment-page-1/#comment-8707 Thu, 11 Oct 2007 20:10:29 +0000 http://www.whydontyou.org.uk/blog/2007/10/10/torture-priest-blames-devil-for-his-conviction/#comment-8707 Indeed..

Just the sort of socially responsible thing they are so good at doing.

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By: John Evo-Mid http://www.whydontyou.org.uk/blog/2007/10/10/torture-priest-blames-devil-for-his-conviction/comment-page-1/#comment-8705 Thu, 11 Oct 2007 17:59:56 +0000 http://www.whydontyou.org.uk/blog/2007/10/10/torture-priest-blames-devil-for-his-conviction/#comment-8705 Heather said: “otherwise you might imagine that some members of the Chilean RC hierarchy must have been involved…..”

Well, that would NEVER happen, as we know from all the times they have turned sexual predators over to enforcement authorities.

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